Friday, October 30, 2009

NFL Week 8 Picks

I'm starting to track the readership of this blog. If you read this blog, please comment on it. Even if it's just a "hey, I like reading your blog", it's appreciated.

This week I'll use part of Guitar World's 100 Greatest Guitar Solos to make my picks.

Texans over Bills... "I Heard it Through the Grapevine"... not much longer for TO's time. I bet he's out of Buffalo soon if he does not start producing.
Bears over Browns... "Eruption"... After last week's massacre in Cincinnati, Bears fans are going to blow a gasket if the Browns beat the Bears.
Cowboys over Seahawks... "Texas Floods"... When it rains, it pours. The Cowboys got a big win last week, and now they draw a should-win to help keep pace in the NFC East.
Lions over Rams... "Yellow Ledbetter"... The lyrics to this song are very hard to understand. Why this game is being billed as an NFL game is much harder to understand.
Ravens over Broncos... "Working Man"... Kyle Orton is going to earn his salary this week if the Broncos win, but I don't think he's ever done that, so I took the Ravens.
Colts over 49ers... "Time"... It's only a matter of time before a lack of running game really starts to hurt the Niners. Not being able to keep Manning and Co. off the field will really hurt this week.
Dolphins over Jets... "Crossroads"... Both of these teams are at a crossroads. The winner is a contender and the loser has a long climb, unless the Patriots start to faulter.
Giants over Eagles... "Beat It"... I sick and tired of this New York versus Philly stuff. Football and baseball mean different things and the Phillies and Yankees aren't even in the same league/conference.
Jaguars over Titans... "While My Guitar Gently Weeps"... The Beatles brought in Eric Clapton for this one, but I don't think the Titans bringing in Vince Young of the bench can end this losing streak.
Chargers over Raiders... "Fade to Black"... Hit the lights on the Raiders, they are done. It was bad enough when they were just losing, now Jamarcus Russell is acting like a whiny punk. It's going to get worse.
Cardinals over Panthers... "One"... One person makes a difference in this game: Jake Delhomme. The less he throws the better chance the Panthers have... so, it's a slim chance.
Packers over Vikings... "Whippin' Post"... Favre and the Vikings defense tied the Packers to the whipping post in the last meeting. Now the shoe is on the other foot, or something.
Saints over Falcons... "Stairway to Heaven"... It's a long, strange trip to the top, their may be bumps in the road, but the Saints have figured out a great system and are looking like the favorites.

Last Week: 11-2
Season: 71-32

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Week 8 College Football

I'm starting to track the readership of this blog. If you read this blog, please comment on it. Even if it's just a "hey, I like reading your blog", it's appreciated.

1: Alabama (8-0)
2: Iowa (8-0)
3: Florida (7-0)
4: Texas (7-0)
5: Cincinnati (7-0)
6: Texas Christian (7-0)
7: Boise State (7-0)
8: Georgia Tech (7-1)
9: Pittsburgh (7-1)
10: Penn State (7-1)
11: Central Michigan (7-1)
12: Southern Cal (6-1)
13: Oregon (6-1)
14: Louisiana State (6-1)
15: West Virginia (6-1)
16: Oklahoma State (6-1)
17: Utah (6-1)
18: Houston (6-1)
19: South Carolina (6-2)
20: Ohio State (6-2)
21: Brigham Young (6-2)
21: Navy (6-2)
23: Virginia Tech (5-2)
23: Arizona (5-2)
25: Miami (FL) (5-2)
26: Notre Dame (5-2)
27: California (5-2)
28: Kansas (5-2)
29: Mississippi (5-2)
30: Wisconsin (5-2)
31: Texas Tech (5-3)
32: Oklahoma (4-3)
33: Clemson (4-3)

Honorable Mention: Idaho (6-2), South Florida (5-2), Rutgers (5-2), Temple (5-2), Troy (5-2).

This weeks picks:
#11 Central Michigan over Boston College... I'm calling for the upset of sorts. You better recognize the Chips, they should win the MAC easily.
Auburn over #29 Mississippi... another upset of sorts. The Tigers are almost ranked in my poll, they may have figured out their offensive slide.
#19 South Carolina over Tennessee... I know they played Alabama close, but they really blew that game, which should have been Alabama's loss.
#3 Florida over Georgia... I think they've learned their lesson and the Gators should not struggle again until the SEC Championship.
#27 California over Arizona State... not sure what was happening to the Bears earlier this year, but they are Holiday Bowl bound.
#13 Oregon over #12 Southern Cal... I think this Trojan team is a year away. That being said, Oregon will lose to Oregon State later on.
#25 Miami (FL) over Wake Forest... didn't Wake used to be competitive? That last play overtime loss to Clemson was the only reason I didn't go 10-0 last week.
#30 Wisconsin over Purdue... you're making me pick this game? Is there any doubt? Yeah, remember, Purdue dropped Ohio State.
#31 Texas Tech over #28 Kansas... Kansas is about to learn how Missouri feels, a three-game losing streak puts a serious damper on any championship talk.
#4 Texas over #16 Oklahoma State... my National Champ pick is looking pretty unstoppable, aren't they?

Last Week: 9-1 (49 pts.)
Season: 55-25 (328 pts., 89th percentile)

Friday, October 23, 2009

NFL Week 7 Picks from Reality TV

I'm starting to track the readership of this blog. If you read this blog, please comment on it. Even if it's just a "hey, I like reading your blog", it's appreciated.
That being said, I'll be referencing reality shows to make the picks this week.

Packers over Browns... The Hills... what do the "cast" of The Hills and the "roster" of the Cleveland Browns have in common? The obvious answer is they are both terrible at their jobs and extremely unwatchable. The better answer is that certain members of each group would rather talk about others behind their back and explore a career in modeling and fashion. I'm looking at you Brady Quinn.

Chargers over Chiefs... Tool Academy... the winner of this game is still a tool, in that they are at least 3 games behind Denver and probably out of the playoff race.

Eagles over Redskins... Celebrity Fit Club... what happened to the Eagles last week? What happened to the Redskins last week? Seriously, was last week the bizzaro-NFL? These two teams need to get in shape... Andy Reid, too.

Giants over Cardinals... Rock of Love: Tour Bus... what's not to love about one of the longest road trips of the year. The winner is in first place in their respective divisions, but considering their divisions (like considering what the winner of Rock of Love gets: Brett Michaels), is that really winning??

Texans over 49ers... The Real World... Sure, the Niners are fighting for first place. Sure the Texans are still alive. But this is the real world, folks. The loser is probably done and the winner stays alive.

Colts over Rams... I Love Money... Picking the Colts is as easy as taking candy from a baby. Which, none of the contestants on this show would object to doing if it meant more exposure.

Steelers over Vikings... Extreme Makeover: Home Edition... if Favre gets anymore makeovers (as in team changes), he might become the first cyborg football player.

Patriots over Buccaneers... I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here (English Edition)... WHY DOES THE NFL INSIST ON PLAYING GAMES OUTSIDE OF THE U.S.???? Europeans (and everyone outside of North America) like soccer, rugby, and cricket much better. It's a ridiculous idea. Stop it. Just please stop.

Bills over Panthers... Survivor... the loser of this game probably loses any chance of making a desperate playoff run. The winner is still technically alive.

Jets over Raiders... The Amazing Race... it's a "race" for Mark Sanchez and Jamarcus Russell to see who can be the first to get a negative quarterback rating.

Bengals over Bears... America's Best Dance Crew... hey, Devin Hester, it's time to put up or shut up. The receiver formally known as Chad Johnson is challenging you to a touchdown celebration contest. Now the only question is will one of you actually score this week?

Falcons over Cowboys... The Bachelor... Yep, Tony Romo is single and looking for love. He's also looking for a chance to actually play like a quality NFL quarterback. This week will be a good opportunity to take notes from Matt Ryan, the REAL hunky quarterback.

Saints over Dolphins... The Cougar... that's what the Dolphins should call their Wildcat formation. It's getting old, but it's still sexy and interesting. And you never know what they'll do to score.

Last Week: 8-6
Season: 60-30

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Week 8 College Football

I'm starting to track the readership of this blog. If you read this blog, please comment on it. Even if it's just a "hey, I like reading your blog", it's appreciated. If you can, please suggest topics for me to discuss... anything goes. Here are the Week 8 Rankings:

1: Alabama (7-0)
2: Iowa (7-0)
3: Florida (6-0)
3: Texas (6-0)
5: Cincinnati (6-0)
6: Texas Christian (6-0)
7: Boise State (6-0)
8: Georgia Tech (6-1)
9: Pittsburgh (6-1)
10: Penn State (6-1)
11: Brigham Young (6-1)
12: Central Michigan (6-1)
13: Idaho (6-1)
14: Southern Cal (5-1)
15: Oregon (5-1)
16: Miami (FL) (5-1)
17: Louisiana State (5-1)
18: Oklahoma State (5-1)
19: West Virginia (5-1)
19: Kansas (5-1)
21: South Florida (5-1)
22: Utah (5-1)
23: Houston (5-1)
24: Virginia Tech (5-2)
25: Ohio State (5-2)
26: South Carolina (5-2)
27: Texas Tech (5-2)
28: Boston College (5-2)
29: Auburn (5-2)
30: Michigan (5-2)
31: Wisconsin (5-2)
32: Notre Dame (4-2)
33: Arizona (4-2)
34: Oregon State (4-2)
35: California (4-2)
36: Nebraska (4-2)
37: Mississippi (4-2)
38: Missouri (4-2)
39: Oklahoma (3-3)
40: Arkansas (3-3)

Honorable Mention: Ohio (5-2), Navy (5-2), Connecticut (4-2), Rutgers (4-2), Temple (4-2), Troy (4-2), Louisiana-Monroe (4-2), Louisiana-Lafayette (4-2).

This weeks games are quite difficult to pick (as usual) so I'm going to use a BCS conspiracy spin on all these (least confident first):
#6 Texas Christian over #11 Brigham Young... game of the week for sure, and I bet you're thinking the BCS conspiracy would have BYU winning. You're wrong. The BCS is okay with a non-auto qualifying school in one of their games. They only want 1 of them, and they are actually looking forward to the controversy of an undefeated Boise State team getting jumped by an undefeated and more deserving TCU team.
#2 Iowa over Michigan State... the BCS would love to see an undefeated Big 10 team in Pasadena whether it be for the Rose Bowl or the Championship.
#15 Oregon over Washington... the BCS needs USC's upcoming opponents to stay strong so USC's strength of schedule goes way up (even though it's top 10 already) and they are a solid lock for the Rose Bowl.
#10 Penn State over #30 Michigan... Let's say Iowa goes undefeated. They might be in the Championship. So, the BCS needs the other Big 10 school to be more traditional. None of this spread offense crap in the Rose Bowl, damn it!
#39 Oklahoma over #19 Kansas... the BCS needs Oklahoma to do win. Heaven forbid a Big 12 North team actually earn a spot in one of their games (Kansas' '07 Orange Bowl was a FLUKE!). Also, we need to be shown why Kansas cannot and will not win more than 7 games every year... because 2 out of 4 years they play the murders row of Oklahoma, Texas and Texas Tech. The same goes for Iowa State (but on opposite years).
#16 Miami (FL) over Clemson... the BCS needs the return of the U. And they would not mind two legitamate ACC teams (include either Virginia Tech or Georgia Tech).
#9 Pittsburgh over #21 South Florida... the BCS can't have the Big East playing round robin upset time all season, someone needs to stand out for several weeks. They'll make sure it comes down to Pittsburgh and Cincinnati.
#17 Louisiana State over #29 Auburn... beyond the night game in Baton Rouge, the BCS like the idea of strongly considering breaking their 2 teams per conference rule... why not surprise everyone by letting LSU in with Alabama and Florida.
#8 Georgia Tech over Virginia... Virginia's been coming on, but a BCS triple option team? What better way to show how out of date the BCS is? (NOTE: I love the triple option, and I picked Georgia Tech to win the ACC so this not a problem for me.)
#3 Texas over #38 Missouri... my heart is telling me to pick the upset, there is no way the Tigers start 0-3 in the conference. Unfortunately, I cannot justify that pick rationally, I cannot remember when we actually beat Texas (ever), and the BCS (and the Big 12) need Texas to cruise into the title game to make up for last year's ridiculousness.

Last Week: 7-3 (44 pts.)
Season: 46-24 (279 pts., 85th percentile)

Saturday, October 17, 2009

NFL Week 6 Picks

Last week was my bad, got busy and could not come up with a decent theme. Last week I picked Buffalo, Pittsburgh, Dallas, Minnesota, Philadelphia, both New Yorks, Washington, Baltimore, San Francisco, Jacksonville, Arizona, Denver and Indianapolis.
This week is a black and white week. By that I mean there are clear cut, easy picks, and then there are picks I have no idea which way they will go.
The clear cuts picks first:
Patriots over Titans... everyone keeps wondering when the Titans will turn it around and get back in the playoff race. I think it could happen... but definitely not this week.
Jets over Bills... I'm just waiting for the T.O. drama and bitching to start, after another embarrassing loss either he goes nuts or his coach gets fired.
Eagles over Raiders... Is Jamarcus Russell alive? He seems so disinterested in every game. How do the Raiders expect to win this guy?
Steelers over Browns... Well, I guess I could pick the team whose starting quarterback's QB rating will be lower than the temperature in Pittsburgh... considering he did actually win last week? NO. Never.
Packers over Lions... This Packers team is better than their record. Two loses to teams that are now 9-1 combined. Now they are at home against a team that is 1-20 since last August? I'll take them.
Redskins over Chiefs... So my uncle said there is no way the Chiefs can go 0-16. Oh, I beg to differ. Last week's heartbreaker was the catalyst they were looking for.
Bengals over Texans... The cardiac Cats should win by more than one score this week.

Now the toss ups:
Broncos over Chargers... only taking the Broncos because they haven't lost yet. Although this could be a let down game.
Falcons over Bears... home team wins, that's all.
Vikings over Ravens... Favre at home, that's all.
Panthers over Buccaneers... the team with the ONE win gets to keep winning.
Seahawks over Cardinals... Did you know that win the Seahawks hold their opponent scoreless, they win?
Jaguars over Rams... Instead of kicking Rush Limbaugh off the proposed buyer's list, sign him up to play d-line. Maybe he can play run defense.
Giants over Saints... I'll take the team with more experience winning and the better defense.

Last week: 8-6
Season: 52-24

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Week 7 College Football

I totally blew posting my NFL picks last week, my bad. More on that in the next post. Here are the ranks for this week (last night's Boise St. vs. Tulsa game is not considered). Lots of 4-2 teams not getting votes in both polls, so lots of honorable mention.

1: Alabama (6-0)
2: Iowa (6-0)
3: Texas (5-0)
4: Florida (5-0)
5: Cincinnati (5-0)
6: Kansas (5-0)
7: South Florida (5-0)
8: Texas Christian (5-0)
9: Boise State (5-0)
10: Virginia Tech (5-1)
11: Oregon (5-1)
12: Ohio State (5-1)
13: Louisiana State (5-1)
14: South Carolina (5-1)
15: Georgia Tech (5-1)
16: Penn State (5-1)
17: Pittsburgh (5-1)
18: Auburn (5-1)
19: Wisconsin (5-1)
20: Brigham Young (5-1)
21: Central Michigan (5-1)
22: Southern Cal (4-1)
23: Miami (FL) (4-1)
24: Notre Dame (4-1)
25: Nebraska (4-1)
26: Oklahoma State (4-1)
27: West Virginia (4-1)
28: Missouri (4-1)
29: Utah (4-1)
30: Houston (4-1)
31: Stanford (4-2)
32: Oregon State (4-2)
33: Michigan (4-2)
34: Oklahoma (3-2)
35: Arkansas (3-2)
36: Mississippi (3-2)

Honorable Mention: Idaho (5-1), Tulsa (4-1), Rutgers (4-1), Louisiana-Monroe (4-2), Ohio (4-2), Wyoming (4-2), Marshall (4-2), Navy (4-2), Ohio (4-2), Northwestern (4-2), Texas Tech (4-2), Boston College (4-2), Wake Forest (4-2), North Carolina (4-2).

This weeks picks, by order of confidence (least first), with why the team WILL win and how they COULD lose...
#22 USC over #24 Notre Dame... USC will win because of the emotional lift of Stefon Johnson getting out of the hospital and their defense. They could lose if Jimmy Clausen is perfect and the Irish can stop the run.
UCLA over Cal... The Bruins will win because they are at home and they've stopped the run well so far. They could lose if the Bears play like they should have all season, like a Rose Bowl caliber team.
Boston College over NC State... BC will win because they aren't reeling from a loss at home to Duke (like the Wolfpack is). They could lose if they don't respect a decent NC State team.
#25 Nebraska over Texas Tech... The Huskers will win with defense and a balanced attack, they'll use the emotion of the comeback last week. They could lose if they don't have any emotion left, and suffer the let down.
#10 Virginia Tech over #15 Georgia Tech... The Hokies will win because they play solid defense and won't be fooled with the triple option. They could lose if their gameplan guesses wrong and Georgia Tech manages to throw the ball well.
#2 Iowa over #19 Wisconsin... The Hawkeyes will win with mistake-free football and an aggressive, balanced attack. They could lose because the let down is coming, sooner or later, and on the road against a good team is a good time.
#16 Penn State over Minnesota... Penn State will win because they shouldn't lose at home to a mediocre conference opponent and they've learned their lesson from the Iowa game. They could lose if the Gophers play like they did against Cal, but hold on this time.
#3 Texas over #34 Oklahoma... Texas wins because they are more balanced, can protect their quarterback, and are still harboring feelings from last year. They could lose if Sam Bradford and his offensive line play out of their minds and prove that big, pocket quarterbacks are still the better prospect.
#26 Oklahoma State over #28 Missouri... The Cowboys will win with their smarter, more balanced spread offense that can run the ball. Plus, they proved they could stop the Tiger's spread last year. They could lose if Missouri figures out how to run the ball and remembers last years devistation, and that they are staring an 0-3 Big 12 start in the face.
#1 Alabama over #14 South Carolina... Alabama will win because they are probably the best-coached and most dynamic team right now and the Gamecocks have looked weak offensively. They could lose if the pressure gets to the first-year quarterback and South Carolina's offense explodes.

Last Week: 7-3 (43 pts.)
Season: 39-21 (235 pts., 84th percentile)

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Week 6 College Football

This week I will unveil my rankings. As I don't believe in the preseason rankings, nor the early week rankings of trying to decide which of the 50+ 2-0 teams are the best, I've waited until after week 5 for my rankings. If you remember from last year, I consider any team receiving votes in BOTH the AP and USA Today polls. Then take the average of their ranks, including their Strength of Schedule, and the best average rank with the best record is higher. I will take all arguments, bring 'em on.

1: Louisiana State (5-0)
2: Alabama (5-0)
3: Iowa (5-0)
4: Cincinnati (5-0)
5: Auburn (5-0)
6: Wisconsin (5-0)
7: South Florida (5-0)
8: Boise State (5-0)
9: Florida (4-0)
10: Texas (4-0)
11: Kansas (4-0)
12: Missouri (4-0)
13: Texas Christian (4-0)
14: Southern Cal (4-1)
15: Virginia Tech (4-1)
16: Oregon (4-1)
17: Ohio State (4-1)
18: Stanford (4-1)
19: Notre Dame (4-1)
20: Georgia Tech (4-1)
21: South Carolina (4-1)
22: Penn State (4-1)
23: Boston College (4-1)
24: Michigan (4-1)
25: Pittsburgh (4-1)
26: Brigham Young (4-1)
27: Miami (FL) (3-1)
28: Arizona (3-1)
29: Nebraska (3-1)
30: Oklahoma State (3-1)
31: Mississippi (3-1)
32: West Virginia (3-1)
33: Utah (3-1)
34: Houston (3-1)
35: Georgia (3-2)
36: Oklahoma (2-2)
Honorable Mention: Tulsa (4-1), Central Michigan (4-1), Idaho (4-1)

It's early, so this is very fluid and WILL change. Remember, #10 Texas was my preseason favorite. For this week, Mizzou will win if the offensive line can open some holes, which has been difficult this season. Here are the rest of the ESPN picks in reserve confidence order.
- #35 Georgia over Tennessee... I'm taking the Dawgs based on the strength of their wins and the performances in their loses.
- #20 Georgia Tech over Florida State... The 'Noles are pretty bipolar, remember they beat Jacksonville State by 2. As long as the option is working, the Jackets are hard to stop.
- #1 LSU over #9 Florida... even if Tebow plays. This was I game I had circled as a tripping place for the champs and if Tebow is not 100%, they will trip.
- #3 Iowa over #24 Michigan... it's a home game for a team that survived their let-down last week. Michigan has some issues to iron out, especially against good run defenses.
- Minnesota over Purdue... why am I having to pick this game? Purdue hasn't beaten anyone good, and Minnesota struggled against Syracuse, and they're quarterbacked by a point guard!
- #16 Oregon over UCLA... the Bruins have some good wins and are at home, but I'm backing the "No one gave us a chance (after week 1) to win" Ducks.
- #17 Ohio State over #6 Wisconsin... I know I put them their, but I think the Badgers are slightly overrated. The Buckeyes have more talent and are at home.
- #5 Auburn over Arkansas... no defense for the Hogs means they can't stop the new Tiger offense.
- #2 Alabama over #31 Mississippi... we all saw what happened to the Rebels against South Carolina, do you think they will play better against the Tide?
- #10 Texas over Colorado... since Coach Hawkins will miss his promise to win 10 games (unless they win out, with a bowl win) do you think the team will quit on him facing a daunting task in Austin?

Last Week: 5-5 (35 pts.)
Season: 32-18 (192 pts., 81st percentile)

Sunday, October 4, 2009

NFL Week 4 Picks from Lewis Black

I cannot pretend that my favorite comedian actually watches the NFL. Knowing how he feels about most popular things, he'd probably find a way to make fun of it. Also, I did not consult him for a quote for each game, just found ones I liked and used them here. Have fun!


Steelers over Chargers - "Let's face it, Americans are fat all year round, but the holidays are when we really hit our stride. And you can bet the food we eat will be just as unhealthy as the families we're forced to visit." The Chargers haven't lost a game in December under Norv Turner. Unfortunately they haven't won one in January... and the other months don't treat them that well either.

Bengals over Browns - "MTV is to music as KFC is to chicken!" ... as the Browns are to football.

Titans over Jaguars - "It’s absolutely stupid that we live without an ozone layer. We have men, we’ve got rockets, we’ve got saran wrap – FIX IT!!!" It's really perplexing that the Titans are 0-3. What happened to the best team in the AFC from last year?

Colts over Seahawks - "When from behind me, a young woman of 25 uttered the following, it was the dumbest thing I have ever heard in my life until Dan Quayle was elected Vice President of the United States. She said, 'if it weren't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college.'" I'm not sure which is more confusing, the Seahawks' offensive gameplans, or their day-glow green jerseys.

Cowboys over Broncos - "What is the difference between a Democrat and a Republican? A Democrat blows, a Republican sucks." It's the same as the difference between the Cowboys and the Broncos.

Bear over Lions - "Thanksgiving used to be Thanksgiving, and it was its own holiday, not Christmas: Part 1. When I was a kid, you ate, and you drank, and you passed out and nobody woke you up and said, 'Let's go shopping.'" Didn't this game used to be on Thanksgiving? Why do I have to be subjected to this without turkey and stuffing?

Giants over Chiefs - "Some people have religion as a means of solace. But, I had a dreidel, so that was out." See, I'm a Chiefs fan, which, right now, means I don't care very much about the NFL.

Patriots over Ravens - "A week ago today, the northeast experienced the biggest blackout in history. And since then, everyone's been sharing their stories of how they got through the blackout. And I'd just like to say to them: SHUT UP!" Yeah, shut up, Patriots fans! Just 'cause you missed the playoffs last year and haven't looked good yet, it's no reason to panic.

Buccaneers over Redskins - "Then of course, there's Dennis Kozlowski. He took from his company 463 million dollars because, well, he had to buy shit. Are you kiddin' me? He gets on the phone: I'd like all the corn in Iowa... 'Cause I'm having a ho-down.'" Basically, Dan Synder is better off spending his money on corn than on this football team.

Dolphins over Bills - "And then there's the Homeland Security system, they had it colour-coded, like we're in fucking elementery school! Simplify it, there should be just three levels of security; Jesus Christ, Goddammit, FUCK ME!" Really, Miami needs to be more simple on offense. Don't force yourselves to run X number of Wildcat plays every game.

Texans over Raiders - "I'm always amazed when I hear people saying; 'That George Bush, he's a great leader.' And I wonder, where can one find a drug that would make one so delusional?" Really, Al Davis is still in charge of an NFL Franchise? They let zombies have positions of authority?

Vikings over Packers - "These ballot initiatives remind us that America is the land where people are free to dream whatever they want, so long as that dream doesn't make Midwesterners feel icky!" Hey, Packers fans, don't try to kill Brett Favre after Monday night's loss. It's not his fault you can't stop the run.

Jets over Saints - "Americans continue to rapidly homogenize ourselves into a neutered oblivion. For a country founded on the protection of the unique, we relish our sameness." This one is dedicated to NFL parity. Only in the NFL could we have a possible Super Bowl preview in week 4 between the Jets and the Saints. Am I dead? Is this hell?

49ers over Rams - "If the people of New Zealand want to be a part of our world, I believe they should hop off their islands and push them closer." Really, if the Rams want to be an NFL team, they need to start playing like one. At least figure out why your offense went from "best ever" to "what offense?"

Last week: 13-3
Season: 34-14 (87th percentile)

Thursday, October 1, 2009

College Picks Week 5

Last week did not go well at all. I must admit I was busy with other things, like my dad being in town for his birthday, and my picks were slightly haphazard. Penn State and Cal really let me down and I turned on Houston and Georgia Tech and they made me pay for it. This week, I will not stray too far from my original thoughts.

Tennessee over Auburn... entirely a home-field advantage call here. The Vols do have a good pass defense that could frustrate an untested Auburn offense.
Georgia over LSU... again, the home team who is riding some good momentum is the pick here. Georgia played well against OSU and just was not quite ready for their response.
UCLA over Stanford... don't get me wrong, I like Toby Gerhardt and Stanford. I just think they're a year away from contending. Where as UCLA has played like the #4 Pac-10 team should.
USC over California... the Bears got destroyed last week and let Oregon into the Pac-10 driver's seat. I expect with Matt Barkley back, they Trojans will start playing like contenders again.
Wisconsin over Minnesota... the Badgers have played well, the Gophers needed overtime to beat Syracuse. I'll lean towards the Badgers.
Oklahoma over Miami... I think we saw what happens when Miami plays a strong, consistent defense last week. Oklahoma probably has a better defense than Virginia Tech.
Arkansas over Texas A&M... I guess sense Tech and OSU got knocked down (by the same Houston team) people think that the Big 12 South needs a third dominating team. They don't, and A&M wouldn't be that team anyway.
Michigan over Michigan State... I think we've learned a lot about these teams so far and their records should exactly where they should be.
Notre Dame over Washington... I said last week that any team that loses 15 straight can't turn it around with 2 wins, even if one's over USC. Here comes the Irish freight train to make it 2-16 in the last 18.
Penn State over Illinois... Missouri put in some doubt and Ohio State proved it, Illinois (and their stars) are overrated. That Rose Bowl was a fluke. Penn State will be angry and taking it out on the Juice.

Last Week: 5-5 (25 pts.)
Season: 27-13 (157 pts., 83rd percentile)